Monday, January 31, 2011

Answer me this ...

Why do some people have a problem with women who have more than two kids?

Although Catholic American couples generally don't have more kids than Protestants do any more, I'm starting to see and hear more from those who have three to eight children. In fact, Dr. Ray Guerendi, a popular EWTN talk-show host, and his wife have adopted twenty children over the years.

We're not talking "welfare mothers". We're talking about families; either the father is the sole wage-earner or the mother works from home, but the milk and rent are not state-provided unless one of them actually works for the state government. They pay for Catholic schools and they pay school taxes. Some of them even tithe; try getting 10% out of your average DINK (dual-income, no kids) couple!

But if they don't get the broad "joke" that implicitly suggests they can stop breeding now—"You know, they know what causes that!"—they get hostile glares, and not because the kids are whiny, raucous brats. Some are even verbally attacked for their "selfishness". Hanh? How's that work?

I want to know, people. I can understand why some people feel they can only afford one or two, or that two is all they can manage. But how does one couple's choice become another couple's obligation?


  1. Hm. I don't know where I got this bias or why it persists while I make progress unravelling others. None of my arguments that having 2 kids is better than having 8 are very compelling. I'll have to work on that. Or was it a rhetorical question?

  2. No, it wasn't a rhetorical question, although I hope you didn't take it personally. As I said, I can see why some couples would try to limit how many children they have. Single parenthood raises the challenges exponentially. But people can get ugly or snotty when confronted by a woman with a passel of kids, even when the kids are well-behaved. There's something definitely "anti-kid" in the cultural air.