Thursday, December 29, 2011

From the "Facepalmbook" department

We've met Becky in Omaha before.  She's a very dear friend of mine, with a good sense of humor.  So today I find this posted:

Actually, I prefer Stoli and Squirt for my vodka sours.  Stolichnaya tastes great after you've left it in the freezer overnight ... that's the only way I drink Stoli.  In fact, cold Stoli is the only vodka I can force down my unwilling esophagus.

Further humor ensues, with one going off on a "rant" and another claiming that life gave him potatoes, so maybe they could work something out, and so forth.  Then comes the puzzler:

What is this ... "Open Auditions" for Rulers of Universes?  GOD ISN'T A VENDOR!  You can't replace an unsatisfactory God for giving you lemons like you can find a new barber after a bad haircut!  Not only does s*** happen, it's gonna continue to happen no matter how many times you swap out religions!  In fact, religion is a way of describing why s*** happens, not a means of avoiding it when it hits the fan!

Plus, Becky didn't say anything about God.

Now, we've all had moments where we realize, "Y'know, that sounded much funnier in my head than when it came out of my mouth."  That's why I contend the worst piece of advice a teacher can ever give a student is "Write the way you talk":  so many people talk without thinking.  Unfortunately, Facebook doesn't come with a "sandbox mode", where you can test your witticisms and pithy observations.  So think before you post!